Wanna join me for a smoke??

Today

“Are you eating outside food?”
“Past seven years am surviving on outside food, haven’t had any problems”
“Are you exposed to the sun a lot”
“No” She was thinking about her cozy air conditioned office, her lovable corner seat and the work hours!!!! Mmmmmmmmm… No exposure to sun…
“Do you have work tension”
“Noooo” She dragged on the ‘o’. Work tension was there, now its peaceful. Touchwood, she thought for herself.
So it started and the volley of questions continued for another fifteen minutes.

End result, she is on sleeping pills.
Wonderful.

She downed the small yellow pill with water and hit the bed. She had a sound sleep, but after tossing and turning umpteen times.

Sleeping pills. Feels good.

Yesterday

Things just happen the way you don’t want them to happen.
People send lousy texts not understanding the exact situation you are in. Can’t blame them though, but still feel quite upset when you receive one. Does one go ahead explain the situation and justify or let the other to wonder whatever it is!
Get to read the not so happening, pathetic news.
Worst of all is getting to feel rejected. When you are turned down and simply blame it on the circumstances.
May be I would do the same, should I be on the other side.
But will I??Ooofff…. These Will I? Wont I? Should I? Shouldn’t I? Can I? really eats you up!!Why should one think so much….. may be that’s how it is. Again… may be!!
All these lil questions make the already miserable feeling lousy. Very lousy.

Hope never dies

He is hoping that everything would get fine at his home. His wife would start to understand him. He would understand his wife and bring peace back home. His daughter would have a happy family to grow with. His mother would be happy to be with her son.
He is trying his best to make things right and hoping for the best.
Hope never dies.

She hopes that she can be with him. Be an understanding partner and give him mental solace. Grow old together. No, why such thoughts. She hopes that she didn’t meet him at all. If she hadn’t met him, she wouldn’t be in this situation. He is genuine. She can’t let other thoughts develop over him.
She just hopes for the best, but whether for her own good or for him, is something she is unsure of.
Hope never dies.

He is unable to figure out what is wrong at which front. Everything was right, if not perfectly right, but right to an extent. Where is the flaw that the whole picture seems to be going out of sync? He hopes that he wouldn’t lose his confidence and he would be able to fight it out. He wishes it would fall in place.
He hopes for the best.
Hope never dies.

Cloud of confusion seems to be clearing for her. She can hope, but what can and should happen will happen, not all what she dreams. She has no right to make him feel guilty or add up to the mental confusion he is in. Though she still wants him, she should not express it out. Its better to mask it and bury within her than to share it and hurt the other. Let the hurt be borne by her. Hope never dies.
But the hope in her mind should die. But is that what she wants??